I was talking to my cousin today, checking in on how she was doing since the loss of her mom a few months ago. I made a particular point of asking her because being a (very young!) senior citizen herself, many people assume that losing a 90 year old parent is not a very big deal. “Part of life” everyone says. But this is wrong. Losing a parent later in life can in some ways be even harder.
Here’s my 2 cents on the subject: “The Child”
1) Was likely a caregiver and very invested in them.
2) Spent lots of time with their parent or doing things for them, especially if they lived in a Nursing Home or other senior community.
3) Got close in later years…I remember my in-laws telling me all kinds of stories about the family that not only had I not heard of, but my husband hadn’t either!
4) Expected them to live forever. Especially with Alzheimer’s, that is well-known as “the long goodbye.”
5) Suddenly, they find they are now the “older generation.”
6) Feels the loss of the old stories that died along with them. Action: Get them now! We lose 900 WWII Vets per day!
7) Realizes their children lost their grandparents.
9) Sees siblings drifting apart making the loss worse.
10) Has to take care of all the legal issues: seeing a lawyer, probating a will, administering a trust, all without the support and advice of the parent they relied upon before.
The death of a parent at any age brings up all kinds of issues….
The fact is losing a parent, whether from a brief illness or long journey, is a life changing event for children of any age. Let’s remember this fact for our friends, neighbors, siblings, spouses and certainly, for ourselves. Let’s take comfort in the fact that there is help out there for all of us.
Our firm has made a significant investment in acquiring the highest quality information designed to guide caregivers and family members through the Alzheimer’s or dementia progression. Our dedicated Alzheimer’s resource center is available FREE, and can be accessed at: www.southfloridamemorylawyer.com
Share this wealth of information with your friends, neighbors, colleagues and family…