As I mentioned last week, my mother is dying. And I can’t get my Dad – who’s normally an outgoing person – to talk about it.
He ranges from knowing she’s dying to not wanting to know. But he never talks about it. And that’s made me think about why we, as a society, are so afraid to talk about death. Like many a person who has hallucinations, we often seem to have a hallucination, as well… that if we don’t talk about it, it won’t happen.
Well, folks, I’m here to tell you that Ben Franklin was right about death and taxes. We talk plenty about taxes. But mention “death” – which, after all, is part of life – and we turn into stone.
News flash! Avoiding the conversation doesn’t postpone death!
Even my Dad once said that we start the process of dying the day we’re born.
So, if you’re a member of the “If-I-Don’t-Talk-About-it, It-Won’t-Happen” Club, here’s a short checklist to make sure you maintain your membership in good standing…
- Do you avoid thinking about death?
- Do you believe that thinking about death makes it happen?
- Are you superstitious about death?
If you checked “Yes” to all three questions… congratulations! You’re a charter member of the club!
This isn’t an easy topic to discuss. But if you know of even one person who’s been around longer because his family didn’t discuss it… I’d like to meet him!
I don’t know how I’ll react when my Mom passes. I don’t know how I’ll feel a year afterward. But I do know this: I’m thinking about it. And I’m letting myself come to terms with it.
If you need someone to talk with about death, we can help. At The Law Offices of Alice Reiter Feld & Associates, we practice Elder Law. For the past 33 years, we’ve walked thousands of South Florida families through this journey. And we’ve prepared them for it in advance, as well, with comprehensive estate planning, wills, trusts, powers of attorney, long-term care planning, asset protection plans, and assistance with Medicaid and the VA.
We can walk you through the journey, too. And we’re just a phone call away.
The Let’s-Not-Talk-About-Death Checklist